i know this will happened again.......lyke last tyme.....when ur tyme are occupied.....there isnt any tyme for me.......and therefore......things will starts change slowly......u will easily get  mad aft done with ur werk...........i noe u are tired.......but do u styll remember that  who am i to u???when ur tyme is fully occupied u tend to forget what u have and who u  with all this while..............a gerl,sick and was alone at home,waiting for sumone to at least txt her.....saying what are u doing???are u ouhkayy????and stuff....
but she dnt receive any.....expecting  a call????that will never be done......just a simple msg...but she cant get it......but yet this gerl......she pick her phone up ...and call hym,that was her bf,but he rejected it  txt her".iam werking".....then she reply hym and said she will call hym during his break tyme.....
ans she waited and waited patiently until it was 6 p.m...cause  that was the tyme that he is having his break......she called hym again......and the called was being rejected.......and he  txt her "?"......that gerl wondered....why cant she talked to hym just for a while during his break tyme???and that guy scolded her in the msg saying that cant she understand that his hp batt is flat.........the gerl keep quiet and  doest disturb hym animore..........then......she lay down on the bed........and  suddenly she vomitted......and start having difficulty to breath......she called her mom  and asked her to be home quick..........she noe that she cnnt seek help frm hym.....althought the person she expecting the most to be by her side was hym.......but he was not the one................theres once  that the guy said to her....'u are troublesome'....frm dere....the gerl realise that when she is sick.......he cant tcre of her.....she appreciate whatever that he has done for hym and frm the bottom of her heart she wanted to say sorry cause she has trouble hym and burden hym......she know that now when he is out there.....he have many better gerls than her.............she even noe that he dislike her to give no to others and he also asked her to change her no.......and she do it..........but she get to noe that he give no to sumone...........she just smile and deep inside theres a millions tears hidden......
im sorry.....
*the gerl*

Being in relationship  thought me alot of things.........

The sweet moment that should be cherish and the hurtful momonet that cant be forgotten.....

love come sincerely on the bottom of ur hearts....it can be force.....love makes u be afraid of getting hurts....when u are in love with sumone ,u just cant stop thinking of them.......u need them by ur side every moment.....u feel safe and comfort when they are near u......dnt ever treat ur loves one lyke a srew driver which u only take them out when u need to screw sumtinz...when u need them..orelse  it will be keep in a tool box and being lock in the store.......

why when u have an arguement u tend to scold them...ditch them .....and throw all the harsh werds to ur love ones...??u even can look down on them.......i just dont understand why u have the heart to look down on them and critic them when acually u are with them.......

when u are with ur peeps u tend to forget them......u need to understand one another .......if ones is a fire.....the other should be the water........never ever  put high hope on the one u loves cause one day they will make u disappointed......they tend to find others more then u when u had an arguement wit them....

being in rlatonship teaches me to be patient..to endure and make me stonger and stronger to face the cuming obstacles.....when u love sumone u will tend to put ur heart and soul....and u trusted them full heartedly.....but sumtimes the break ur trust for them....trust is lyke paper that i easily crumbled.......

when they betray u....they lie to u.........they ignore u..they hurts u.....ur heart just broke into pieces.....

some feel lyke running away....some will revenge but only some will cry and let they be the only one that get hurts.......why cant we be treated lyke an human being that have feelings???we are not a toy which is heartless.......why cant we try not to hurts others......?

being in a relationship is bcorz u need sumone to care for u...lurve u......be a listening ears for u.....accompany u in ur  lyfe and bring the happy moment together ....it isnt abt hating them and hurting them.......

Bby please dnt hurt me .....:(

                                      

Dearest smurfy........

how should i phrase it..........bie...i just wanna sae that our arguement start bcorz of the outing.....u plan the outing and i really look forward for that day but end up it is just a disappoinment for me........if u noe u want werk then why u plan and gif false hope bie....???i bet u also dnt lyke last min chamge of plans ryte..........and bcorz of this u say this will be the last u cntct me???wat acually u want to say???and for the first tyme u talked to me lyke that...be do u noe that that hurts alot.......i have never expect the one that i love have the heart to say to me lyke tat...........u really dnt have too....im sorrie for making u love me and im sorrie for  making u having me in ur lyfe......im sorrie......u swear that u wont let me down for the second tyme but  now u really do.....and that hurts alot alot.......thx bby for everytinz and sorrie for all that have gone wrong.....u will be happier now aites.......remember although im far frm u bck i always lurve u.......t cre......:'(

To my dearest yanii.........
firstly i wanna say sorrie for not replying ur msg yesterdae cause i slip already ....den i wan reply u aft i woked up but i scared if that is not ur no.......so i writ down here at my blog.....if u came by to read my blog......i wanna sae.....i mad at u that tyme bcorz the day before u top up smurfy hp.....u were otp with me......and before u put down the phone u said that u will get thru me to pass msg to smurf......that y i waited.......and get to noe frm smurfy the nxt day saying that u top up for hym just to otp with hym.......yanii ....adyla tak mrh pon kalo yanii nk bbl ngan smurf cause adyla tawu yg yanii tak adr intention laen....and i believe that.......u only want to asked for help......kalo yaniii org top up kn hp mataer yanii just to tok to hym....yanii mrh tak......??i understand ur situation dear......adyla tak suke psl ya nii ckp laen tapy yanii uat laen....u say u will get thru me to pass msg to smurf but end up u top up his hp and tok to hym ask for help.......and what i wrote earlier at my blog saying that dnt let others interfere to our rlationship....i was trying to sae that dnt let  other to solve the prob ....do u noe that .....me and smurf argue just bcorz i was defending u while he was defending ating......haiss......n listen here...although i am mad at u tat tyme....i dnt have any grudges  on u........i styll regards u s my frenz.....and dnt worry im not bragging abt this animore...wat past is past aites bby......im sorrie if  i was harsh.......t cre aites....n promise me u wnt do stupid stuff eventhough u are down.........
adyla......

Message receive on 19 oct 2010.......
1.41 a.m..
"BBY....
I WANNA CNFESS SUMTIN...NOWDAYS ,I DUNNOE WAT,I DUNNOE WHY I TEND 2 MISS U EASILY...EVEN THOUGH I TEND 2 GET IRRITATED BY U SUMTIMES,I TEND 2MISS THE CUTE SMILE OF URS,UR EYES,UR BBY FACE,N WAT I MISSES MOST IS WHEN U SULK...I MISS THOSE THINGS WHENEVER URE NOT WIT ME...ALL THIS TINGS HAD REALI MADE ME HARD TO LET GO OF U...I LOVE U BBY...I LOVE U...THX FOR GIVING ME THE CHANCE 2 LOVE U,I SWEAR TO GOD I WUD NOT LET U DOWN FOR THE SECOND TYME...U HAVE WON MY HEART LYK NO ONE USE 2....CONGRATS HONEY....NOW SLIP TYTE KAY?CNT WAIT 2 MYT U....."
And today when u meet me......it tends to be that u are not showing what u said......just now check on his hp as usual......then i knew that his frenz had msg hym just now...but when i check the msg is gone.....so i ask hym nicely says that'u delete msg npk?'den he started to  raise his voice at me....wow..!!thx aites.......dislike ppl does tat to u but u tend to do it at others........aft that he open the gate  and walked off lyke that..........u want show ur attitude to me????might as well dnt txt me lyke this earlier......msg bbl baek2.......dah jumpe prangai last warning........k fine........u want to create a scene ..........den up to u.........u always says but u never proof wat u says.......hate me to go off just lyke but now u doing that do me.....really thx ........!thx for everythinz...!gdbye.......

i just dont get it......why must u get thru hym  wen acually u can get thru me.....lyke wth xia.....u did to the extend ouhkayyy......yes...i know that u wanted to ask hym for help but .....but u told me the day before....u will get thru me if u want hym to help.....i bet u will be mad also if   sumone did that to ur loves ones......nie bkn jealous......im not even jealous that u want to tok to hym or wat so ever.....corz i noe u dnt have any intention....but the way u asking for help is way way beyond the limit.....and i noe that u are down ryte now bcorz of hym.....but be strong...u need to talk tinz out wit hym.....lyke u use to advise me.......dnt easily gif  up ........u need to be firm once awhile.....u just cnt be thw water  every tyme.....stand for ur ryte...........haisss........if u came by to read my blog.....just wanna say.....  u tcre......u must try to handle tinz out....n dnt let others to interfere........


                          lately .....he txt me lyke as if i dnt have feeling......for instant..just now  he txt me  very sarcasticly just bcorz i dnt txt hym aft i finish skewl.....he dnt even noe the real story yet he wants to get mad........i didnt txt u bcorz ma batt is flat.....see for urself....u also did not txt me wen u already with ur frenz....but i dnt make a fuss.....and now u showing attitude towards me.....aper nie????u really change alot......when i txt u ,u did not reply....den might as well dnt need to top up ur hp...am i ryte......but when it is ur peeps tat txt u ,immediately u will reply them..........u are way way much diff now...!!!i kinda dislike the changes in u now......i can see that u only finds me when u need me or else u wont.....im tired of being the victim......u wont realise ur mistake.....u wont!!!i  always  control my anger,my disappoinment and my sadness toward u.......but u dnt even give a damn.....now u want to start  avoiding........if u tink u want to avoid frm me....might as well i bck off and u dnt have to find me animore.......u really giving me hint that u want me to bck off......i have nvr treated u soo badly...the way u treated me....i have  never..!.but u never appreciate me....u taking me for granted.....u  regards me lyke as if im a toy that can be thrown away want u dnt need it animore......u never realise....never...!the harsh werds that came out fr ur mouth.....u dnt realise......tcre if i am no longer dere........:('
*ppl wont realised  that they are hurting sumone until u lost that sumone u love.....*

why suddenly he treats me lyke this....????been crying the whole day longs....asking my self  what i have i done ......why is he avoiding me????is he really  leaving me.....???i really need to sumone to be by my side now.....im sooo down .....nothing can cheer me up......the last msg that he sent to me is....'if u tink u hate me more than u love me,den leave me...maybe ur love is not wit me...maybe ur ex understands u betta...if we were to be parted,trust me bby, i wnt be shocked...cos i noe it will happen sumday..."how would u feel when ur love ones txt u lyke this......???i am sure u will tink is he leaving you......haiss!!!
aper slh i bie....???smpi u sanggop uat i mcm manusia yg tkder perasaan......im just hurt with the way u treating me........bby.....i want an ans frm u.....i will be waiting......:('
misshing sumone that im not sure is misshing me......

bby...u have never appreciate what i have done fer u......is always question me what i have done......today ..in the morning.....suddenly receive a msg frm hym saying this...'bsk kte mit...then wen u start skola,kte tq mit..lau bley,once in awhile kte aru jumpe"never!in the whole entire abt 8 mths we are together he said this to me.....n this was the first tyme.....before this he always wanted to meet me lyke everyday.....suddenly with this changes...what up......i was so speechless....all kind of thoughts is playing in my mind......maybe he have sumone else??maybe he is sick and tired of meeting me??maybe he wants to get rid of me????and maybe i have never been a gd gf fer hym.....and now.....when i txt hym....he will either not reply or he reply late.....lyke wat wrong wit u???at tyme u are ouhkayyy...and at tyme u are not......haisss!!!now...he dnt even txt me.....he finds me when he is bored......or not with his peeps....it is as if im in rlationship wit sumone else...it is just not u......the old smurfy that always wanted me to be wit hym all the tyme....the smurfy who will find me when i am not with hym......you said u need me but accualy u dnt............u just dnt mean what u said........i knew deres more to come....n now  ...when we had an arguement......the  word 'leave'will always appear.....why?????u really want me to leave u????u will only realise when the one u love leave u???haiss!!!bby u are not the same......im just hurt with the way u are now.........i wil missh u so badly......love u haizel bin rosman......i really need u now.....:('

Yesterday....aft meet my dearest love at orchard......i went to meet my long lost bestie,aida....at somerset.....it has been a long tyme we have not met as both of us are bz with our stuff......she has just came bck frm medan,trip with her skewl....n she is getting darker and darker....hahhah....tak lamer agy jady ank india.....heee.....anw....thx love for the wallet that u bought fer me.....

I KEEP WONDERING WHY MUST WE PROMISE TO SUMONE EVENTHOUGH YOU CANT FULFILL UR PROMISES.....U JUST MAKE THE OTHER PARTIES HEARTBROKEN,SAD,DISAPPOINTED AND MAD AT U.....

IS IT THAT HARD TO DO WHAT U HAVE PROMISE?

HE ALWAYS PROMISES ME ALOT OF THINGS...BUT END UP HE DOES NOT FULFILL IT....I JUST CANT TELL HYM HOW I FEEL SUMTIMES....INSTEAD OF ME GETTING MAD...HE WILL BE THE ONE THAT IS MAD.....HAISSS!!

HE KEEP ON RAISING HIS VOICE AT ME....AND WHEN I DO THE SAME THINGS TO HYM...HE WILL SHOW HIS ATTITUDE....IM JUST TRYING TO MAKE U HAPPY   BUT IT SEEMS U DNT APPRECIATE IT.....SEDEY KANN......PPL SAID THAT IF THEY HAVE A REPLACEMENT THEY WILL TREAT THEIR CURRENT ONES DIFFERENTLY.....IS THAT TRUE???SO DOES THIS MEAN THAT HE HAVE SUMONE ELSE???

EVERYTYME WHEN HE IS NOT WITH ME......I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT HE IS DOING......I TRY TRUST HYM....BUT WHEN EVERY TYME THE TRUST HAS GAIN BACK....HE MAKE IT LOSS AGAIN.....FOR INSTANT.....I JUST FIND OUT THAT HE DARE TO LIE TO ME RECENTLY........WHEN I GET TO NOE THE TRUTH......SERIOUSLY HE BREAK MY HEART DOWN.....BUT I DNT SHOW IT  CAUSE HE WONT CARE.........INSTEAD I SMILE......BUT DEEP INSIDE.....NO ONES NOE HOW I REALLY FEELS......IF HE DARES TO LIE TO ME NOW.....WHAT ABT IN THE FUTURE???IS DERE MORE TO COME???

PPL DO CHANGE AS TYME CHANGE.....U TAKING ME FOR GRANTED........MAYBE ONCE U LOSS ME THEN  U WILL CHANGED.......SUMTIMES I JUST FEELS THAT U DNT NEED ME TO BE WITH U......U CAN STYLL GO ON WITHOUT ME.......:(

DISAPPOINMENT..........

ppl seems to change as time goes by.......recently also get scolded frm hym.....dunnoe why.....every little tinz he tends to get mad easily and tend to raise his voice to me.....before this he nvr evr raise his voice to me...and now he does!!!sad kn kn.....haisss!!!!!kadang-kadang i syg u....kdg-kdg i benci u...kdg2 i geram ngan u....haisss....!!!.....sumtimes i just dnt feel the  respect anymore.....u find me wen u need me orelse u wont........wat to do....in rlationship deres ups and downs.....u nvr appreciate wat u have now......'im sorry bby...imysm...i wont take u for granted....ily...'tis is wat u stated earlier.......are u sure u really mean wat u say.....anw....im jus disappointed tat u lie to me....if mama tkder i dnt tink i will noe till todae.......dnt understand why u have to lie to me???...i have nvr lie to u...every little tinz i will tell u......if u dare to start to lie to me now.....what abt the future....???is dere more to come....????what do u get  if u lie to me???money????U GET NOTHING!!!NOTHING!!!haisss.....and abt wat u told me abt work.....im not sure if tat the best u get werk.....but till wen u want to live in that world????i want u earned money by sumthinz else.....deres alot of jobs vaccancy that u can get or apply......its the matter of fact u want it or dnt......but if u choose to do that jobs still.....one tinz that i can sae.....u noe wat i like and wat i dislike so......if u choose wat that i dnt want u to do....then i tink  we cnt get along with each other......all i want is the best for u.....and i dnt want anytinz bad to happened to u.......haisss....!!!!i want a guys to lead me the way but not the other way round......i love you  bby........!